The Second Scariest Thing

After going on three weeks of my husband being out of the house, and trying to toe the line with pastors and church leaders during this situation, I finally had to write this letter to all of them.  It has become clear to me that there are two contradictory voices speaking into my situation -...

New Life

We had our final meeting a few days ago. I did it.  I spoke up.  I said what I really wanted, which was an indefinite separation. I explained that this was based on what I knew to be true, not on what might happen down the road.  I acknowledged that we serve a big God...

The Flowchart

It's been a few more days.  A few more days of peace in my household. One of the strange things, but not so strange, if you think of it, is that it's suddenly easier to keep the place tidy.  I mean, sure, with my husband gone, there is one less person here. But he's gone...

Undecided

Meeting #2 happened.  This time I spoke up for myself.  I told my small group leader ahead of time that when I am in a room with my husband, my brain shuts down and I can't speak about what exactly the problem is.  She told me I had to speak up. I told her I...

Nudging Fatigue and Telling it To Rouse Courage

Repentant Husband is back.  He also has no idea how badly he handled himself at the meeting. I gently explained what he had done and he was genuinely astonished.  He had thought it went well and that things were going along the way they should be. After I pointed out what he had done, he...

About-Face

My husband and I had our meeting with the pastor.  This should be the place where I relate in glowing terms how encouraging it was now that my husband is in his new-found state of repentance. Well.  "Should."  Whenever I start talking in terms of "should" I tend to get myself into trouble. Needless to...

Looking For Trouble In All The Wrong Places

My 23 year old daughter walked to our local Target this afternoon.  It's something we all do - it's only about four blocks away so it's a good way to get exercise when you are only buying a few things. She, however, is young, blond and pretty. Just about every time she goes to the...