Small Victories… Eternal Results

So this year I'm teaching a couple of online English courses. Oh right, hey, hi everyone, yes, it's been, like, a year. Oops sorry. I graduated - got my BA in English. And then a few months later I thought it would be spiffing to go for my MA so I'm doing that now and...

It’s a Good Day To Succeed…. Tomorrow.

Tonight I had to introduce myself at a Bible study and I froze and couldn't remember my name. In my defense I got a concussion in December that I am not allowed to talk about due to litigation. Because it was at a department store and a sign fell on my head. And also a...

Grief. And Online Articles That Read Like A High School Essay Assignment.

I'm embracing the fact that I'm in grief.  My psychologist told me to pay attention and be mindful about it.  So instead of just writing down two things I'm grateful for each day, I'm also writing down two things that make me sad. Today's pithy thought was, "This break-up is stupid and there's nothing I...

I Spoke

I think the past few years have been primarily about me finding my voice.  And getting myself and my kids to a place of emotional safety, of course, but none of that could have happened if I hadn't found my voice. Which is a little ironic, if you had known me for years, because there's...

The Flood

Yesterday the last straw hit. A friend texted and wondered where I'd been at the worship team dinner the night before, because my husband had been there. Backstory: We were both told we had to step down from serving on that team when we separated last year. But for some reason he showed up at...

Of Irony, Karma and Tedious Nonsense

I haven't written in so long that I'm just going to have to let go of the desire to bring everything up to date. In the long run, the details of this separation, the shenanigans of my husband trying to manipulate his way back into the house, and the ensuing chaos really won't matter.  So...

Dude, Do You Even Work Out?

I had a difficult phone conversation with my husband yesterday.  He called to ask me some questions about the various repair projects we're having done to the house. Which was fine. But I realize now he was in a mood, so he made every part of the discussion much more difficult than it needed to...

Standing Up

Counseling has been getting real these days.  My counselor called me on my constant referral to "the terrible wounds" that have resulted from my marriage and asked me to define them. Off the top of my head, I couldn't. Partly because I had stuffed them into a deep dark hole so I wouldn't have to...

Freedom From The Cloud of Bad

As I'm walking out this new journey of living without my narcissist husband in the house, I'm starting to breathe again, little by little. So while, as I've mentioned before, the emotions are a bit of a roller coaster, the more I move down this road, the more I feel safe enough to take stock...

Avoid Such People

The verse that has been coming into my mind for the past couple of months, regarding my narcissist husband and the crisis it has brought our family to, is the one that says, "In the last days, men will be lovers of themselves..." I've been taking a little comfort in the fact that this terrible...