The Second Scariest Thing

After going on three weeks of my husband being out of the house, and trying to toe the line with pastors and church leaders during this situation, I finally had to write this letter to all of them.  It has become clear to me that there are two contradictory voices speaking into my situation -... Continue Reading →


My husband and I had our meeting with the pastor.  This should be the place where I relate in glowing terms how encouraging it was now that my husband is in his new-found state of repentance. Well.  "Should."  Whenever I start talking in terms of "should" I tend to get myself into trouble. Needless to... Continue Reading →

Desert Rose

So we quit therapy. I finally got to the point where I couldn't lay my heart bare week after week in session, receive a stammered apology and then be ignored for the rest of the week. So I called it quits.  I told the therapist and my husband that I was no longer willing to... Continue Reading →

At Sea, In a Good Way

I got side-swiped in therapy again today.  Only this time, in a good way. The counselor picked up where we left off last time - where we were all left hanging, rather -- and asked me to say how it felt when he kept making everything be about me and my problems.  So she did... Continue Reading →

Just For The Record

I hate VagueBooking and cryptic posts. Having said that, I'm in the middle of correcting 9 essays on Macbeth and a stack of homework on John Milton, so I don't have time to give the complete story.  But something has been changing, slowly at first, but picking up speed, and today I came to a... Continue Reading →

Honesty To Drown In

Today is the first chance I've had to think for days.  Last week we hit the ground running with our counseling appointment Wednesday and I haven't had a moment to process since. It was good.  I remember that.  Enough good was done that some pressure lifted, because the next two blogs I wrote were not... Continue Reading →

Burn Out

I saw our counselor by myself this week.  I walked away from that appointment floating on air.  For the first time ever, I feel like a therapist understands exactly what I'm dealing with. She sees it. She sees through the well-polished exterior my husband presents.  She's not fooled a bit. This means, of course, that... Continue Reading →

Borrowed Hope

So, my husband and I are going to a counselor.  She is amazing.  Just a little FYI:  If you are having marital difficulties, find a counselor that does EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy). It's different from the run-of-the-mill and it WORKS way better than the usual "communication skills" approach.  Trust me on this. At any rate,... Continue Reading →

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